Shannon got the boot last week. I don’t feel bad for her. She is 16 with a promising career playing college volleyball and going into the Olympics, or possibly going into the WNBA.
Judges. Look at them curves on J Lo! Hips don’t lie…. Wait, that’s Shakira.
Randy is usual fly, polka dot Robert Graham, black velore jacket. Steven is wearing a zuit suit out of the county jail.
Seacrest’s hair: Ahh, the finger messed up hair doo! With a sweet vest and prim and proper pocket square… This guy!
Jimmy =freak. Diddy=Can’t nobody take his pride, Can’t nobody hold him down. (It’s a song) And he looks pissed!
They’re up. It’s Billy Joel time tonight…ack ack ack ack ack ack!
Kris is up first. His hair pulled back is a waste of hair, according to Hilfiger! Let it go, dog. Release yourself! He sings the good die Young and his black leather shirt under his white vest makes me swallow my throwup. The gimp bracelets on his wrist bring me back to Miss McMillan’s first grade class. Oh, his voice? I didn’t love it at all, think this guy is just ok. The judges liked it to start the show but weren’t jumping up and down.
Erika: One of the blondes that’s got to go. She is singing “New York State of Mind”, but wait..... she is no longer a blonde! She comes out with short black hair! Weak attempt at contemporary less talented, black haired version of the singer Pink. Not happening Van Pelt, but maybe it will? She has a pleasant voice but the switch up of hair do throws me off. But Randy loved the look and vocals, J Lo didn’t recognize her and Steven said it was outstanding.
Breath right: Hilfiger tells Josh that he needs to wear a Tux to be special. Josh smiles ear to ear, cracking his breath right strip, causing bloods to drip into his mouth. Josh is singing “She’s Gotta Win” I didn’t love the song choice but thought he once again killed it. Josh certainly has a beast of a voice, and while he didn’t know the song (neither did I) he sang it like he did. But his constant need to take it to church sometimes turns me off. He’s still good, but I could see the young viewership not voting for him.
Here is a pic of Josh after Seacrest just gave him the money shot.
Skylar: Still feel guilty for calling her a deranged hamster the other week… Tonight she is singing “Shameless.” She sure has passion, and is good at putting a country twist on any song, but not for me. She is a cornfed munchkin. Her earrings were big, but not as big as her ass! Slight case of Assgiganticus?
The judges thought it was slow in the beginning and said it was "just good."
See her here giving the finger to the crowd.
Elise: Yes, the bitch Elise. She is wearing an Eskimo hat in the clip with a super size lance Armstrong bracelet. She is singing “Vienna” Who? Vienna from the Bachelor?
No. Elise screamed into the mic as if it was one of her ex boyfriends. She really does have a powerful voice, but I still want her gone. She doesn’t light up the stage at all, and the most entertaining part of the performance was the Hitler looking guy in the background, playing the accordion and looking like a huge creeper! See here:
Phil Phil: Hilfiger says he is too timid. He starts caressing Phil until Phils beats him over the head with his guitar. Splat. What????.........Anywho, Phil is singing “Moving Out”, which I predicted! I knew he’d sing that! And I knew he’d kill it. He listens to nothing anyone said by wearing gray and having his guitar, and was feisty with the mic! He got in the zone and made it his own. This guy is in it to win it. He’s got it all. The judges agreed, and Steven threw gave him his scarf that was made out of a trashbag!
Hollie: Hollie goes with the white pant suit tonight with the glitzy yellow 80’s wristbands. Everyone knows her voice is powerhouse and she is one of the frontrunners, but this wasn’t her best performance. I was disappointed tonight with her and will be really upset if she gets the boot. The judges didn’t like it either… uh oh.
Heejoon: He is singing “My Life.” Heejoon is the hilarious token asian in the competition, but last weekend he didn’t impress me at all. Tonight he is dressed like an emo-hipster-homeless-punk that shops at Ubiq on Walnut. Hilfiger basically says to him, you need to wear something an Asian in the Fast and the furious would wear... Okay… Heejoon is a funny guy but the performance was wack and sort of rubbed me the wrong way. J lo said it was fun, Steven calls him Hee-man and says he needs to take it more serious (agreed!), Randy said there were vocal problems but he was happy to see him have a good time.
Jessica: She gives Hilfiger a boner because she is cute and petite. She is singing “Everybody has a dream” Wow! She sings the hell out of it and really demonstrates the passion she has for singing by hitting it out of the park! She's got pipes on her and is the real package. I want to like someone else more to avoid being cliche, but she is too good right now. The judges by no surprise gave her a much deserving standing ovation.
Colton: I really like Colton. He is singing the "Piano Man" tonight and it’s an opportunity for him to bask in his niche and tear it up on the piano. A red piano! His Mohawk mullet was on point tonight, and the peach fuzz facial hair gave him the edge he was looking for. And his vocal performance gave him the edge that I and America was looking for. Well done! J Lo got goosies, Steven loved it, and Randy said he was a real Rockstar.
Love this show, love you, love Idolisms.
Samitz. Out
I initially was disappointed that the songbook was going to be Billy Joel, but I must say that the kids really killed it. Everyone did a super job, but Heejan and Deandre were the bottom two in my book. I had never heard of a few of the songs. Phil Phillips has no chance to take it all, but he was amazing
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